Life is Anything but Predictable

It is always the person who you will not think will ever hurt you that always does and it is always the best friend that’s “forever” that ends up being the one who’s not. Nothing is fucking predictable, and you cannot predict anyones intentions in your life, you can only live through them. And these past couple weeks I have been feeling so damn alone, I seem to forget that I am surrounded by people. I used to think that we were forever. I mean, we have been through worst, and we were still side by side after it all and now nothing has even happened, we just stopped telling each other everything and then we just stopped telling each other anything at all, and then before I could even make sense of it, there was so much distance between us that there was nothing to reach for anymore. You are so far away, and there is no point in reaching over anymore because we are not the same people we used to be. I used to think that when somebody said they loved you they will love you forever. I used to think loving someone was something that would never go away. The words “I love you” were so raw for me, but none of that makes sense anymore because the truth is, people lie. Sometimes “I love you” is just a lie, and sometimes it is not. But when do you know when it is real? the answer is, you do not… and sometimes someone will love you one day and then completely ignore you the next for no reason at all. nothing about anything makes sense anymore. people are here one day, they are gone the next. sometimes you do not even get a reason, you just get to stay up night after night wondering where the fuck did it all go wrong? And it just does not make sense. nothing makes sense, and I do not know how to take in the fact that, there are no reasons for why things happen, and sometimes you get no reason to why someone just stops loving you and stops being there for you. You just get to live through it.

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