Have you ever stayed up late with someone, texting or chatting and the hours ticked by that you’d be ridiculously tired in the morning but it didn’t matter because it was really fun? It was really fun and totally worth losing sleep just to laugh with someone and enjoy their company. And then the next day you keep tiredly recalling how much fun it was while you’re falling asleep in class and that makes it not so bad that you’re tired anymore.
Never think you’re nothing. Never cry at night over not being pretty enough. Never tell yourself you’ll never be good enough. Because to someone, you’re everything. To someone, you’re gorgeous. To someone, you’re the world.
You are losing me and not even realizing it. You lose me a little more every time you do not answer my calls on purpose. You lose me a little more every time you choose someone else when the only person I ever chose is you. You lose me a little more every time you take me for granted. You lose me a little more every time I go to bed wondering, “why am I not good enough for him?” But, I am more than enough for you. It’s you that is not good enough for me. Because if you were worthy of me, you would realize my value. And one day you will lose me for good. Because I’m going to get to a point where there is nothing more I have to offer and I will walk away. And it will hurt me to do so. Because I looked at you with wide eyes full of faith that depleted over time. One day I will be the one not answering. One day those snaps you send will be ignored and you will send another just in case. It will scare the shit out of you, the moment I start threatening you the way you threatened me. You will ask me out and I will politely decline. You will blow up my newsfeed and begin to become more interested in what I am up to but more than that who I am with. Because it is not you making me smile anymore. You will miss the nights when I laid beside you and all I ever wanted to do was talk. The silence will kill you, and you wish for just one more conversation. You will hold onto everything I ever got you and it will be a hurtful reminder of the me; a girl who loved you just a little too much. And maybe you will look back and remember there was not a mystery to me. But there was an honesty you have never known in someone. I did not play games like the others. And as you fumble through girl after girl, you will find something in them all missing. It will be in them you look for me but I will never be found.
Have you ever watched the person that you love slowly lose interest in you? It starts off little, you can’t quite put your finger on it, but something is different, something has changed. Everything feels slightly off, off like a Monday. You can almost hear it in their voice, you can see it in their eyes. You think it’s you, you start overthinking every single little thing, wondering what you did, where it all went wrong, how you can fix it. It starts off with little things like waking up to no text, calls becoming fewer and farther between, the lack of effort, emotion and the excuses begin to pile up. Soon it starts tearing you apart, the feeling of not being good enough begins to make you feel physically sick. You know it’s coming, you know you can’t do anything to stop it. The aching doesn’t stop.
I never knew how beautiful a broken soul could be. I never really understood the concept of loving someone for everything they are and not just loving the parts I liked. I never knew how attached I could become to another person. I never knew it was possible to find myself in another person. I never knew the importance of showing appreciation or receiving appreciation. I never knew just how much ONE person could make such a HUGE difference in my life until I met you. As cliche as it sounds I have to admit you are different but a kind of different; You make the impossible, possible.
- If it won’t matter after 72 hours, it never did.
- If you won’t feel the need to react after 72 hours, don’t at all.
- If they know you’re hurting and haven’t checked up within 72 hours, move on.
Don’t be so hard on yourself. Think of it this way: ever wonder why it’s so easy to offer advice but when you’re in a difficult situation, the answers aren’t as clear? Thats because when someone else comes to you with a problem, they are in a maze and lost, while you have a birds eye view from above and can easily see where they need to go to get out of the maze. However, when you’re in the maze (your problem), all you see are barriers and need an outside perspective to help you turn the right way. Keep in mind, they can only tell you which way to go, but not force your legs into walking that direction. Whether to walk that way or not is entirely in your decision.